Tag Archives: orgasm

Day 96-Mastubation Magic

You may have heard of sex magic, tonight I decided to try a little self-pleasure magic!  I had the opportunity to study with Kenneth Ray Stubbs, sacred sex author and filmmaker.  He taught me about the 4 elements of sexuality.

1)Water Sex- Pleasure Sex

2) Air Sex- Romantic Love

3) Fire Sex- Transformational or Energy Merging Sex

and 4) Earth Sex- Sex for Procreation.

I like to think that Earth Sex can be sex for PRO-CREATION, in other words something is manifested as a result of sexual energy, expression and pleasure.  I set an intention that my orgasm help to manifest the safe return of my partner on his journey home.  As I self-pleasured I kept breathing deeply and holding the intention that my partner return safely home to my arms.  I had this sense that he would be leaving the Playa early, that he was missing me and our son.  On the way to Burningman the car kept overheating, so I kept the visualization that his journey home was smooth, safe and quick.   It was a nice way to connect with him.  As I write this I notice that I have been connecting with him these last few days even if we can’t e-mail or call.  I’ve been connecting with him through these self-pleasure sessions.  What a great way to stay intimate even though we are hundreds of miles away from each other!

Day 93- Dreams, Fairies, and Nipples

Dreams of juicy sex!  Woke up wanting to play…but had to wait.  My co-author Jon Hanauer and I were supposed to be on Playboy Radio today.  But it was cancelled due to the Hostess Tiffany Granath being sick. I hope she is feeling better.  Since I now had the day free I did a lot catch up writing, but took a break for my Self-Pleasure practice.  I climbed up into the love loft, where I plugged in a new Massage Wand.  It’s called the Fairy Wand.  I was also sent the attachment for internally stimulation but it was smelly.  I was hesitant to try it because I wasn’t sure about toxicity, it’s important not to put toxic stuff in our vaginas. (So I checked the site and the attachment it totally body safe- maybe I should have checked it out so that I could relax about it!) I didn’t get all that into it.  I was worried about the toxic smell and my wrists were really hurting from all of the writing I’ve been doing.  I spent more time massaging my wrists with the Fairy Wand.  Hey, this is self pleasure and if my genitals aren’t feeling it then why not go somewhere else on my body?  Massaging my wrists did bring me pleasure.

I also finally tried the pretty little nipple clamps that Eden Fantasys sent me.  I think because I am still breastfeeding I just wasn’t into it.  I was more interested in putting them on my clit. And at a later date I could see using them on my partner.  I gave up on clamps and the fairy wand and went to a wooden toy by Nobessesnce and with my own clitoral stimulation until I had a great orgasm.

Day 92- Kegelcisor and Phone Sex

I was on Playboy Radio almost a month ago when one of the callers gave me a homework assignment to try phone sex.  I came home and did some research and found a number on Betty Dodson’s site1800 EROTICA.  I went into the session feeling like I wouldn’t really be able to get into it and that it would ultimately turn out to be cheesy and dumb.  I was wrong.

Here’s my experience…

I was nervous, and I had been putting this assignment off, so I was somewhat pushing myself through resistance to try this.  Today, is the day! First, I picked out a toy to play with.  I got my new favorite lubeAloe Cadabra, and a Kegelcisor.  I read the instructions on the Kegelcisor, lubed up and dialed the number for the phone sex line.  First they wanted to verify my age, I had to answer a few questions to an automatic service.  It was discreet and non-invasive.  Plus, free I might add.  Then they asked if I was a man or a woman and if I was looking for a man or a woman.  Next, I was asked to make a personal message.  So, I recorded a short blurb about play and experimentation.  Then I was given a number of messages to listen to from men.  I was surprised that some of them were really sweet, some were very erotic, and some I knew right away that I wasn’t interested in.  Almost instantly I started getting private messages and invites for connection.  Some of the private messages were very arousing.  I’m putting it all out there, so I have to admit that the more arousing ones were men describing what they were doing or what they wanted to do.  I was less turned on by messages about age, hair color, location, weight or whatever.  While I listened to the messages I started in with clitoral stimulation and playing with the Kegelcisor.  I loved the weight of the Kegelcisor and the idea that I was working my pelvic floor muscles.  I finally did choose someone to connect with.  It was a message about teaching me how this all worked.  Ultimately the sex educator in me won out.  I wanted to learn so that I could teach!  Unfortunately, the caller was no longer on the line, so I went back to listening to the sea of erotic voices out there.  All of them seemed to want anonymous erotic connection.   I rode the sea of male voices on the line, that was pretty much enough for me.  Some of their messages I played over and over.  I had three orgasms that rolled into each other, first two vaginal orgasm and then a deep clitoral orgasm.  And right when a voice said “I would really like to be there when you have an orgasm”.  Well, he got his wish.

I hung up the phone and kept playing with the Kegelcisor.  I did about 5 minutes of specific exercises for my pelvic floor muscles.  It felt great post orgasm, like a deep massage after an intense workout.

I would actually recommend this.  It was fun, it was exciting and new, and I felt in control of who I wanted to talk to.  And it was pleasurable!  The thought did cross my mind that some people might consider phone sex cheating.  I’m in an open relationship so it isn’t an issue for me.  However, I could see how some people might get triggered by it.  On another note, phone sex is safe sex.  You don’t have to worry about STD’s, STI’s or emotional entanglements.

Day 48- Aswini 4 Orgasm Mudra

After a fulfilling day of private session work, I decided to practice what I preach.  I modified a technique called Aswini Mudra for one of my clients who is wanting to pro-long orgasms.  I thought it would be a great way to enjoy myself during my self-pleasure session.  So I started out with Aswini Mudra- inhaling one third of my lung capacity, contracting and relaxing my anal sphincter rapidly, inhaling a second third, contracting and relaxing, filling my lungs, contracting and relaxing, holding the contraction, holding my breath, rolling my shoulders up and forward and dropping my chin to my chest.  Lifting my chin, taking a sniff of air, as I relaxed all the tension from my body.  I did this all the while sitting with the heel of my foot on my clitoris.

After a few rounds I went fully into my self-pleasure, lying on the floor with a Liberator Fascinator Throe for some soft padding.  I had the Njoy Pure Wand handy.  I started with some clitoral stimulation combined with the Aswini Mudra.  After I felt adequately aroused I decided to use the Pure Wand.  With the small end I did g-spot, u-spot and a-spot stimulation.  AWESOME!  The combination of Aswini Mudra, with clitoral stimulation and the Pure Wand sent me into multiple orgasms.  It started when I got close to a clitoral orgasm and I stopped the clitoral stimulation which triggered a Vaginal Orgasm.  It was a large, wonderful extended orgasm.  Then I went back to clitoral stimulation combined with the Pure Wand on my g-spot and u-spot, next thing I knew I was ejaculating.  I kept going.  Soon after came the big bang clitoral orgasm.  I rested for a moment with aftershocks and sexual energy coursing through my body.


Day 44- Morning Bliss

I wish that every session could happen just as I am waking up. Oh, I so enjoy morning self-pleasuring! For one, I know that I can go into orgasms without having to worry about the fact that they keep me from sleeping. In the morning orgasms are like drinking a triple expresso. This morning I had the opportunity to do a little self love. I spent time massaging my vulva, belly and thighs. I used direct clitoral stimulation with fingers. It was a bit of my usual pattern, stimulating my clitoris combined with body tension. I had an awesome clitoral orgasm. But felt like I could definitely keep going, so I went for a couple more through the same technique. Afterwards I felt happy, energized and ready to conquer my day!

Day 39- Lingerie- Lending a Hand

I’ve been wanting to do something with Lingerie since I started this expedition.  So today I got out a little bra and pantie set that I had bought for a Playboy shoot that I did earlier this year.  This self-pleasure session did involve my partner.  He was loving the lingerie and it started what turned out to be one very “hot” lovemaking session.  During the session, as per the theme of self-pleasuring, I leant a hand by giving myself clitoral stimulation as we had intercourse.  It was awesome.  I had both vaginal and clitoral orgasms, and my partner was riding on wave after wave of energetic orgasm before going over the edge into an ejaculatory orgasm.  I wanted to continue my self-pleasure by checking out the lingerie in a mirror so that I could see my sexiness.  And did I look sexy!  I have never liked lingerie because I never felt like I looked good in it, but this was awesome.  I felt like one hot mamma, and that felt really good.  I think I’ll have to get some more to add to my collection.  Ladies, if you are on the fence about Lingerie, well, I advise not giving up on it and go on a hunt for stuff that makes you feel sexy.  I think that the most important part, was the feeling sexy piece.  It increase my libido, it increased my partner’s libido, and it made the whole experience really fun.  Not to mention that it was very out of our pattern since I have never worn lingerie before, so it gave the whole thing that extra level of the erotic.  It was like being together in the begining of our relationship, before the baby, when everything is new.  I loved it!

Day 18- Pleasure Waves

Decided to self-pleasure in my delux hotel room in Scotland.  Started by massaging my breast with Breast Balm, they’re really sore from all the milk pumping since I am away from my baby, so I treated them nice.  I set the intention to really get in touch with my feminine side, so often I live in the masculine (making business decisions, running the household, managing finances).  I wanted to just let go and surrender.  I thought that perhaps my own masculine could take me through the Pleasure Wave Formula I have been working on.  I started with safety, just making myself feel safe as I lay in the bed.  I took some deep breaths.  From there I played with my body with light arousing touch.  Back into stillness I drifted between sleep and awake.  Then into medium arousal, back into stillness, to higer arousal with combined g-spot and clitoral stimulation, until I had a wonderful orgasm, which I spread all over my body.  I sat in stillness again to notice how I felt different from when I began.  When I showed up at the conference I felt like I was glowing!  What a way to start!

Day 16- Aromatherapy and Orgasm

I’ve heard that smell can trigger orgasms because of the link between the olfactory nerve and memory centers of the brain.  So I decided to go ahead and experiment with this by using some Frankincense oil.  I love Frankincense because it reminds me of annointing.  I love thinking of Goddesses annointing their lovers with fresh Frankincense oil.  So I will experiment with Frankincense as a trigger to orgasm.  I took some deep inhales of the scent and then rubbed the oil into my feet.  I payed special attention to the place at the bottom of my foot that the Taoist refer to as the bubbling spring.  From there I hopped onto my massage table where I massaged my nether regions with the Inspire Massage Wand.  I played with a variety of techniques including putting the Inspire on my finger which I placed on my clitoris.  I notice that my orgasms with a vibrator are short and light as opposed to the deeper more intense orgasms that I get from using my hands.

Day 11- The Dentist, Sex Toys and Positions

Early this morning I woke up on the wrong side of the bed (so much for my elevated moods theory!) due to the fact that I was running late for the dentist, where I knew I would be tortured for the next three hours.  Someone suggested that I take a vibrator with me to counter balance the pain with pleasure.  I wasn’t brave enough for that, but I did go there in my mind and felt some arousal combined with the sound of drilling.  All was good until I got the bill for $1700.oo ouch!  That hurt worse than anything.  I went to Yoga class because I was a ball of tension, it helped some, but by the time I got home I was glum and not at all in the mood.  Pain and financial yuck make a combination for low libido.  But when I went down to my office I found a giant box of sex toys and erotica from Eden Fantasys waiting for me!  Yippee!  But before I dove in I decided to go up to my love loft and continue my yoga practice, only this time with clitoral stimulation.  I often here of couples playing with sexual positions, but I’ve never heard of anyone doing solo sex in a variety of twists, so I went for it: Downdog, Forward Bends, Back Bends, Legs Open, Legs Shut, Pigeon, Up Dog, Side Twists, you name it, it tired it.  I noticed that closed leg positions or positions that required some muscular tension seems to be the most arousing for my body.  After all that I went back to my office to film, and to open my giant box of toys!  I laid them all out on my massage table and thought to myself that this 101 Days of Self Pleasure is the best idea I’ve ever had! Here’s a pic… http://101daysofpleasure.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/06/109_0092.jpg